I am so sick of this dark cloud hanging over me. I'm no good to myself or anyone else like this, but what can I do? I'm stuck with this until it decides to move on. Usually, a good night's sleep will suffice to get rid of a 'mood.' All I've done for the last two weeks is work and sleep, it seems, and I wake up feeling little better (emotionally) than when I went to sleep. I need to find a doctor to talk to. Perhaps a change of medication would help.

I'm afraid. I haven't been this bad since I was first diagnosed, and I don't remember being this bad for this long then. I've even had passing thoughts of suicide. I couldn't do that, though. I would hurt too many people, and it's the quitter's way out, anyway. That is not the solution to anything, it's just the ultimate avoidance technique.

Past finding a good shrink (a challenge in itself), I'm not sure what to do. I don't see how I can change any of the stressors in my life. In spite of the stress, I love my job and the people I work with. It literally is my dream job, and I don't want to quit (can't anyway), can't just decide "ya know, I just don't think I'll be bisexual anymore."

God, please help me. I don't think anyone else can.